VALENTINE DIARY:The question persists "will you be my valentine!!"

n.b.-Wow! Got this piece in my last year diary.

Feb14 2012.

 A break through ,a new day,known world wide and so celebrated,understood too little yet elaborated so much,dilute in meaning yet concentrated to shyness.

In my mirror I saw one small kid and one little serene afternoon.

I tell you afternoon was my first love---the very first valentine,days ago when I could not even pronounce this word phonetically.

and the list cotinues..time flows...entropy gets directed.
Let me list the list of valentines lost and valentines regained.

1. JUST KIDDING : It all started with some serene afternoon of summer(1996-97).Amidst coal fields there lie some structural sectors,blocks--bhuli nagar D block sector 9..I still remember.and better I remember 'my other ego'.One little kid sitting on the window desk of third floor,counting passerby vehicles.....and even better I remember one tracker accident that snatched all regale from me.That beauty beneath people shivering still walking hard to workplace,beauty of instant and suspense prevailing breaks,beauty of variable frequency of horns..and a lot that a beholder's eye can assume. But an accident took all away and in exchange It fetched me some temporal marks and scars...symbolic of what I lost....and so I lost my first valentine,I  left Dhanbaad.

2.CRICKET : Sleeping with radio set tuned in tempting volume,waking up just at 4 morning whenever India toured Nzland ,and six morning whenever India toured Australia ,just to get the synopsis of Adilade through BBC NEWS...There are many things I learned from cricket other than this early rising habits.The accent and tones in which my english fluctuates is one of them.There are countless marked valentines with continuous afternoon to cherish the liveliness of test matches.

3.ACE AND OTHER 51  Then one sunny afternoon my dad taught me the literal basics of different card games.Something I got fascinated enthusiastically.This pack of 52 continued with me through several boarding lives...challenging rules and regulation,developing codes out of codes,flawless yet carefree..I never knew when I lost this valentine.

4.MATHEMATICS  Mathematics is one of those lost valentine which assured me a brand(I mean IIT).Yet its foot prints are alive on the sands of my cerebrality. May be in form of financial statement analysis or may be designing securities .

5.SUMMER OF 42  Among the stack it should be the last and most latest valentine I lost.Left bereft out of time travelogue I felt .Some day I got nostalgic to that old dialogue "there is a ship in the ocean that gets magnified as it approaches you" and one morning you take the last supper ans leave.The ship gets dwarf, more dwarf with time.Obvious,and expected it was. 

"then i am afraid of loss...........

this summer of   '42 will last one day.

what else will be left,

some incidents, names, days and premises.

what else will be left,

you, your self,your hugs and kisses.

the penetrating silence of my eyes say

let love be love;

and nothing else anyway.________________my hundred and first me(january 2011)

6.LITERATURE  Out of multitudes of catheresis and catalysis,this is something that stills shares coffee with me.The genre has changed time and again yet  the language is same.

7.ALCOHOL KILLS  Drink of solace is a solution.A tranquilizer and a channelizer. People say it kills.....I rather say it murders.It murders emptiness.That is something I expressed some months ago______________

"I have collegues to drink drive and die

I have people to laugh sing and enjoy

but,oh! no lap to consume sink and cry.

of course I m bad,worst are  my habits

the long lasting debts,and the rarest credits.

yet distant enough you are 

to recommend me amendments.

And distant enough I am

to interpret your silence."____________of course I am bad ,worst are my habits(august 2011)

8.THE DARK TEMPEST And my most recent valentine is darkness.Ageless love for afternoon subdues...as night befalls.That I mentioned in my  note________

"A night or two before twilight.

moon was imperfect yet bright.

some tempest kissing my coconut tree..

some frequency from a radio tuned to bbc..

some pigeons silent ,white yet dark..

some wood fire flickering  , a hope in spark."_________tempests continue kissing some breasts(january 2012)

In the same mirror that I was talking about in the beginning....

in the mirror ,

I see a tempting glass of wine.

in the mirror,

I see a lone love sublime.

The dilemma of choice strikes the dilemma to dine.

The question persists  "will you be my valentine!!"